Tuesday, March 16th, 2010
Youth Invention Deathmatch
In the left corner, we have heavyweight sixth grader Matthew Wimpey slugging away with Baby Safe Deluxe, a sanitary cloth that can stick to and cover an entire public restroom changing table surface. You know, sort of like a disposable potty seat cover because you’re a germophobe.
In the right corner, we have lightweight 5-year-old kindergartner Grace Coller pushing a one-piece baby sleeper with color-coded crotch snaps. She aims to cut down on parental snap confusion, that awkward situation where you’re finishing up your baby’s crotch snaps and you discover you have one extra snap missing its partner.
Sadly, further details are lacking on these two fledgling products as they were only recently unveiled at youth invention fairs in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania and Greenville, South Carolina.
I’m skeptical of the boy’s invention because what does a male, let alone a sixth grade boy, know about changing tables? Meanwhile, that little girl’s crotch snaps will only serve to efficiently tell you that you’ve screwed up. Sure, you could snap the crotch snaps first using the color coding, but who among us can summon the Herculean strength required to accomplish such a feat? That’s why missing snaps are always found when finishing up the crotch!
But don’t listen to me. What say you Thinga-readers? Which of these amazing inventions will crush the competition? In coming to your opinion, feel free to fill the absence of detailed information about these products with whatever you feel comfortable making up from your imagination.