Monday, July 6th, 2009
Fame or Shame Game #16: Pug-Powered Prams, LLC
[video link via Neatorama]
I propose to enlist you dear Thinga-readers in an exciting business venture. Become capital investors in my new company, Pug-Powered Prams, LLC!
A recent discovery reveals that pug pups make exemplary baby stroller pushers. Their only limitation is a need to walk in a straight line while being plied with motivational reinforcement in the form of doggie treats.
I propose a new invention and turnkey business that will become popular wherever parental disinterest and sloth is celebrated.
The Invention: An automatic dog food dispensing system that attaches to a stroller handlebar. An odometer affixed to the stroller wheel wirelessly transmits distance pushed to the food unit. Scooby Snacks are automatically dispensed based on distance pushed, custom tuned to each dog’s gluttonous needs.
The Business: Open a chain of baby strolling centers throughout north America where weary mothers congregate to chat and dine while their babies are entertained in a safe indoor strolling environment.
Babies are pushed by store-supplied pugs on an indoor oval track. Supplied jogging strollers will have a pivoting front wheel that safely turns the strollers along each dog’s strolling lane — made possible by a 3-inch lip on both sides which prevents lane jumping.
Customers are charged based on desired walking time. Through training and observation, walking time is regulated by the amount of Scooby Snacks inserted into each feeding unit. When there is no more food to dispense, the dog stops walking and the baby is safely extricated from the stroller by the mother.
- Safe all-weather wholesome baby entertainment
- Networking opportunities for mothers
- Make friends in a fun atmosphere
- Pug play pen for older children
- Stroller / dog rentals
- Stroller motion lulls infants to sleep, ensuring long rental times and repeat customers.
- Food and liquor sales
- Optional LCD screen mount to show babies educational DVDs while strolling
- Coin-operated diaper and wipe dispenser in restrooms
- Live and web-based wagering on baby races and dog poop bingo
Tell me dear Thinga-readers, is my business proposal destined for fame or shame… and why? Begin your comment with “Fame because…” or “Shame because…”
Feel free to also propose a name for my chain of strolling stores.