Three Unusual Baby and Toddler Products, Vol. 8

Photo of the Fropper ride-on toy featuring green caster wheels on poles, a red horizontal U-shaped seat and two upright handlebar poles culminating in black handle grips.

Fropper by International Playthings is a ride-on crab for 18-month-olds. Sit down, grab his handle-grip eye stalks and blind ol’ Fropper as you push him around the house on his caster wheels.

Okay, Fropper is not officially a minimalist interpretation of a crab. It’s just a damned odd contraption that sort of resembles a crab, or a bug or maybe a tongue on wheels.

Its two-level seat contains a "spring system," so presumably your kid hops up and down, as if sliding across the floor isn’t enough. Fropper retails for $80.

Photo of Temporary Tattoos with a Purpose. That tattoo reads: If I am lost, please help me be found. Write your phone number here with included marker after tattoo is applied and dry. The tattoo size if 1.75 inches square.

Kid ID tags. You can’t put a dog collar on your kid, so tattoo your phone number to the kid’s arm. That’s the idea behind a variety of temporary tattoo products. There are Temporary Tattoos with a Purpose, SafetyTat and the Removable Child ID Tattoo Kit. Or you could grab a Sharpie pen and write your phone number across your child’s belly.

You know, brand your toddler like cattle for when you attend a big public event or go traveling to a strange place and recklessly lose track of the most important thing in your life. Personally, if I felt I needed something more than a phone number taped to the inside of a shoe or the tag on a T-shirt, I’d probably buy a child leash.

Photo of an ice-blue Snow Bear toddler sled stylized as molded plastic polar bear who is sliding with his legs in front of him. A pull-rope is attached to the front of the sled.

Now that winter is past for most of us and our envy will be tempered, behold the Snow Bear by Pelican International. Your toddler sits upright in this molded polar bear, strapped in a safety harness as you pull him through the snow.

The listed age range is birth to 24 months, but I wonder whether newborns sit properly reclined to keep their airway open under the strain of their bobble heads.

Although the Snow Bear retails for a mere $30, it answers a question I’ve often pondered… why do rich people live in mansions? Answer: to store their extensive collection of ginormously sweet playthings.

See also: Three Unusual Baby and Toddler Products:

  • Volume 1: High Leg chair extender, nursing bracelet, Clever Coverz.
  • Volume 2: PlatePal, Mama Snot Pluck, Tubsider parent seat.
  • Volume 3: The Zoo animal storage, Sneeze Sleeve, The Potty Song.
  • Volume 4: Yellow pages booster seat, My First Zamboni, Solar System Travel Bag.
  • Volume 5 Japanese edition: shampoo hat, nursing bottle scissors, Pooh bedpan.
  • Volume 6: Doll playground, baby cologne, foam receiving blanket.
  • Volume 7: Horse chariot, leather-like baby gear, Babywunder Deluxe.
  • Volume 8: Fropper, safety tattoos, Snow Bear sled.
  • Volume 9: Birthday Suit Bear, Wooden Train Chandelier, Pink Lego Bucket.
     

Comments

11 Responses to “Three Unusual Baby and Toddler Products, Vol. 8”

  1. lindsey says:

    I’m not exactly proud of it….but we own a leash. I bought it for a recent trip where we would be making numerous stops in different airports. It helped, because he didn’t want to ride in the Ergo all the time, and when I was checking tickets or something, I could just bring him in closer to me.

    April 3rd, 2008 at 7:07 am

  2. AJ says:

    Oh, don’t get me wrong. In a crowded area or if you have lots of kids, I can see now (in hindsight after hearing from other parents) where a “leash” has its usefulness.

    I’d much rather my plan be “tether my child to me” … than for it to be “let the kid get lost and hope someone calls my cell phone.”

    April 3rd, 2008 at 8:30 am

  3. Cindi says:

    Hello! I have never owned a leash and have never needed it. In fact, my two sons stuck to me like glue! I wanted to say give me some room to breath, but then I didn’t want them to start roaming.
    Cindi

    April 3rd, 2008 at 10:05 am

  4. Beckie says:

    Those tattoos are kinda freaky. I had a pouch on DD’s back at Disneyland, though she was slung most of the trip, there were designated times when she got down. The pouch on the outside said “If I am lost, my contact information is inside” and it was very visible on her back. I got many a comment from Disneyland cast members, on how cool it was. Now the tattoo, that’s just odd. Not sure a cast member would search a child for a tattoo, ya know?

    April 3rd, 2008 at 10:21 am

  5. K G S says:

    We just got back from a trip involving airports, trains, and buses with our daughter and felt no need for a leash or dog tags. There’s only one of her, and she’s not a reckless solo explorer of strange, crowded places.

    If we’d added our three young escape artist nephews to the mix, the kids would have been sporting leashes, Sharpie “tattoos,” and probably LoJacks, especially if (heaven forbid) there were only one adult around.

    April 3rd, 2008 at 10:21 am

  6. My Boaz's Ruth says:

    Yes, KGS I understand many of those who feel the leash is most useful are those who are trying to corral multiple children at once.

    April 3rd, 2008 at 12:31 pm

  7. Lisa says:

    Yanno, that crab thing, if you were to sit in it backwards (with your back on the handle bars) it sort of looks like it could be a simple students computer chair, don’t ya think? They just removed the back, added handle bars and made the seat look like a big tongue.

    I have a son who sticks to me but a daughter who doesn’t answer you immediately (or not at all) if you call for her and she loves to wander. I would hate to get a leash.

    AJ i was hoping you might do a review on the Mommy I’m Here Child Locator……:- /

    April 3rd, 2008 at 12:57 pm

  8. Noreen says:

    the kid tattoo is just too weird, plus what if someone memorizes the number and call you later.

    April 3rd, 2008 at 11:55 pm

  9. Diana (Holes In My Shiny Veneer) says:

    OK, my 2yo daughter would love the Fropper– she’d finally be able to bounce while seated! (She’s basically Tigger in a dress, bouncing all day long…)

    As for “branding” our 2 kiddos, our daughter uses a leash actually as an instrument of freedom– she knows it’s her alternative if she doesn’t want to hold hands in a busy place like the mall or Disneyland.

    However, because she’s been known to wiggle away, my husband and I decided to get both kids silicone bracelets that say “Mama’s cell xxx-xxx-xxxx” and “Papa’s cell xxx-xxx-xxxx.”

    We thought it was a great idea (thinking it would be something our kiddos would actually enjoy wearing– that and not wanting to go the Sharpie route.) However, the only time anyone has ever called my phone because of the bracelet was when mall security called me to say they found the bracelet! Guess that toddler-sized bracelet wasn’t quite small enough…

    April 5th, 2008 at 10:36 am

  10. Danielle S says:

    I actually like the tattoos! LOL!

    April 6th, 2008 at 10:14 pm

  11. Stephanie Elie says:

    It looks like a giant bug, but for some reason I’m drawn to it. I think my kids would love it.

    April 16th, 2008 at 1:09 pm

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