Complete this Sentence: I Want to Buy this Pedal Powered Forklift Ride-on Toy Because…

Let’s explore an experimental contest format. Complete the sentence that accompanies the real product photo below. Your prize is the glory heaped upon you by your fellow parents. Be snide, proud, defensive, thoughtful, funny or mildly disturbing.

Photo of a toy forklift ride-on toy with a functioning fork that raises and lowers.

I want to buy this Pedal Powered Forklift Ride-on Toy because…

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27 Responses to “Complete this Sentence: I Want to Buy this Pedal Powered Forklift Ride-on Toy Because…”

  1. AJ says:

    …I want my children to have the very best view of the parade.

    September 7th, 2007 at 12:08 am

  2. Christina says:

    Let’s face it: College is too expensive and I want my child to have a headstart on a good career.

    September 7th, 2007 at 2:01 am

  3. Chief Family Officer says:

    it will actually keep my toddler occupied and happy for most of the day.(he actually has a similar toy that he loves!).

    September 7th, 2007 at 5:26 am

  4. Leslie says:

    …I’m tired of lifting my boy to the top bunk at bedtime.

    September 7th, 2007 at 6:07 am

  5. Becky says:

    hello sailor, who wouldn’t?

    September 7th, 2007 at 6:32 am

  6. Rachel says:

    Just what I need!! Now when we move into our new house I can spend the whole time drinking margaritas while my 2yr. old does all the work.
    Thanks Thingamababy!

    September 7th, 2007 at 6:45 am

  7. Tim says:

    …now the kid can pick up his own damn diapers and wipes at Costco.

    September 7th, 2007 at 7:23 am

  8. Jennifer says:

    someone has to take the trash out, get the holiday decorations out of storage, and do all the heavy moving…why not use child labor!?! Isn’t that what they’re here for?

    September 7th, 2007 at 7:47 am

  9. Lori says:

    good forklift operators are hard to find. start training one early.

    September 7th, 2007 at 8:11 am

  10. Kim says:

    …I’m tired of pushing a stroller everywhere. My boy can hoist me up and pedal me around for a change!

    September 7th, 2007 at 3:05 pm

  11. Captain Tomorrow says:

    …Christmas is around the corner. Do you think I’m going to hold the kids up so they can hang every single ornament? Timmy! Elevate your daughter this minute!

    September 8th, 2007 at 12:23 am

  12. Linda says:

    …the doctors in our ER are such hunks.

    September 8th, 2007 at 6:17 pm

  13. MarciaMarcia says:

    More in style than the front end loader motor grader he drives around now. He’ll stop hearing, “Why haven’t you junked that ol thing?”

    September 9th, 2007 at 6:37 pm

  14. thordora says:

    I’m a dork with a short husband.

    September 9th, 2007 at 7:07 pm

  15. Jim says:

    …I want to run a “Green” child sweatshop.

    September 10th, 2007 at 7:03 am

  16. Cass says:

    I can never reach the cereal on the top shelf in the grocery store. Plus if we have one of these I can pimp him out to help all the other shorties in the store.

    September 10th, 2007 at 10:06 am

  17. Kim says:

    …I can have my kid lift the furniture to vaccuum under, instead of having to rearrange the living room every time.

    September 10th, 2007 at 1:50 pm

  18. Cherish says:

    … because my husband fixes Linde forklifts for a living!

    September 10th, 2007 at 2:42 pm

  19. Jessica G says:

    … egalitarian yard art is an important political statement, especially when the neighbor kid has a pink Barbie Hummer parked in her yard.

    September 10th, 2007 at 5:04 pm

  20. Jessica Ashley (Sassafrass) says:

    Because I know know KNOW that the hubs couldn’t resist riding in this thing himself and I would pay big money to see him pedaling it with his knees up by his ears and the kid squealing and shouting out orders from the palate in the front. Good times, my friends. Good times.

    September 10th, 2007 at 6:45 pm

  21. AJ says:

    …I need a way to get my toddler Jell-O wrestling ring out of the beer freezer and into my truck to take it home.

    It’s an idea developed from DaddyTypes’ profile of an inflatable baby spa (see the photo, then read the user comments).

    September 11th, 2007 at 10:26 am

  22. OM says:

    …we need something to park next to the motorized Escalade.

    May 30th, 2008 at 3:29 am

  23. Ticia says:

    how else am I going to lift the heavy boxes?

    May 30th, 2008 at 6:11 am

  24. Stephanie says:

    … we need to declutter the house. We’ll just put the kid to work.

    May 30th, 2008 at 6:45 am

  25. JMo says:

    Damn!! It looks like FUN!

    May 30th, 2008 at 8:55 am

  26. Pippin says:

    after Sissy runs over the dog with her pink Caddy, someone is gonna have to dispose of the dead animal, and Mommy says she’s not touching it.

    May 30th, 2008 at 12:50 pm

  27. gen from uk says:

    wow my toddler can now go off to work with daddy!sweet

    November 26th, 2008 at 12:00 am

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