Three Unusual Baby Food Patents

1. Baby Feeding Bed takes the nuisance out of mealtime. No longer do you have to lovingly hold your baby in your arms or give him the constant care and attention he needs and deserves.

Patent diagram of the baby feeding bed.

Baby feeding table/bed and bottle.

No, the modern thinking, or at least the thinking of one Mervin S. Boyd in 1976, was to strap your child to a table. A plastic bed frame and mattress are elevated off the floor with telescoping legs, giving the whole thing the appearance of a card table. A milk bottle is suspended from a table arm over your baby’s face to facilitate feeding. A safety strap keeps your baby from moving about. This bed-table is also billed as doubling as a washing tub.

The patent states, "the feeding process does not require the constant attention of the mother." Oops. An unattended baby left feeding can choke and die. There are many gadgets currently sold retail for propping up a baby bottle in front of a baby’s face that I’ve chosen not to talk about on Thingamababy. Thankfully, so far, small entrepreneurs have produced all of them. I’d be surprised if many national manufacturers would consider such a product.

Patent diagram of the baby feeding system.

Jar-to-bottle adapter for baby food, plus spoon adapter for squeezable dining.

2. Baby Feeding System is an adapter that connects a baby food jar to a plastic squeeze bottle. Once connected, the food jar is turned upside down so that its pureed contents are transferred to the squeeze bottle with assistance from gravity. Next, the adapter is removed. A spoon adapter is then screwed onto the squeeze bottle, allowing gooey food to be squeezed onto the spoon for feeding. Why? Because pouring baby food into a bowl and using a regular spoon is too complicated… I guess.

In this product’s defense, some parents incorrectly spoon food directly from a baby jar, which is a no-no if the infant isn’t going to finish the jar in the same feeding session. A spoon that has been in your child’s mouth spreads bacteria into the jar. So, this inventor’s detachable spoon might prevent that common form of germ transmission. However, what is easier to clean? A bowl and spoon, or a bottle and spoon adapter?

Patent diagram of the cereal action figure.

Breakfast cereal action figure blob thing.

3. A Cereal Action Figure is a glob of breakfast cereal bonded into the shape of a toy figure in one solid, dry cohesive piece. This action figure breaks apart in a bowl when milk is added and is eaten like normal breakfast cereal. This invention would "stimulate [a] child’s imagination and encourage him to eat the cereal."

The patent application shows a drawing of a blob-like monster made of cereal, but wouldn’t you want to see the Wicked Witch of the West dissolve? I’m sure merchandisers would eat up the chance to sell Sponge Bob Berry Blast, Dora the Chex Explorer and Toastie Thomas the Train.

See related: index to historical baby items.


One Response to “Three Unusual Baby Food Patents”

  1. judy says:

    I want this breakfast thingy in my life immediately before my kids get any older…this might be as good as pop rocks!

    March 20th, 2007 at 4:34 am

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